is it over yet?

A certain someone decided to wish me a happy birthday via a private message on facebook. He won't openly friend me, so I'm pretty sure he's not "available", so it's not okay with me that he's looking me up. When I first saw the message, I almost didn't answer. But I was having a good day (43 rocks, ya'll!), and I finally figured I could just answer with a generic "always good to hear from an old friend", which I did.

whatever.

Next thing I know, he wants to know what I've been up to for the last 8 years, and he's telling me how he got his bachelors in accounting a few years back, and now works at a local college. He even interviewed at my office back when he'd first finished school, though I knew nothing about it at the time.

Anyway, the upshot of the whole thing, for me, was that I sat there thinking about it, and thinking about how he KNOWS I can't just be his "friend" (my feelings run way too deep for that), and how unfair it is for him to decide to "re-open communications", and what was I going to do about it? And then I realized, there's got to be someone out there that I could feel that strongly for, who is not otherwise involved, I just have to find him, and I'm just so DONE with that particular relationship!

Which is something I never thought I'd even come close to. I just couldn't get past it before. (Except, with Husband#2, because that was totally unconditional on my part, but he left, and there you are.) I couldn't ever say to myself that I'd had enough of waiting (for what, I can't say), and besides, I deserve a guy who is faithful by nature, and not some guy who thinks it's okay to open a dialog with an old girlfriend when he's still married.

I am so ready to meet someone new. Bring it on.