Tuesday, August 10, 2010

power of prayer

Recently, I've been praying that I might meet someone. Preferably, the "right" someone. But, whatever the Lord thinks I'm up for would be fine.

This is new for me. Acquiring a habit for regular morning prayer took me years, yes, and it's finally something I do every day. But that's not what I mean. Asking my Heavenly Father to help me find someone is just so far from...anything I ever did before. I had my reasons. And I also figured it would happen if it was supposed to, anyway, even if I wasn't asking for it.

I haven't met anyone yet.

But...

something else has changed. I noticed after the first week (of asking) that I felt like wearing dresses or skirts every day. And putting on make-up. Every day. Most days, I even try to do something with my hair so it's not just hanging there, eliciting the comment "gosh, your hair is so long..." (which I don't exactly find a compliment in, it being a clear statement of fact, and not exactly something I have any control over. It's not like I changed my diet or found some magical way to get it to grow. It just grows. And I have trouble finding someone that can cut my hair well, following the curls, so, it gets long).

I don't know if anything else will come of this. I got to where I felt a little silly asking every day if He could help me meet that certain someone, and I focused myself a little more on the family. But I still think about it, and still ask at least once a week.

Thing is, I guess this means I'm done with that other. That one that I sort of held onto, thinking that in some way I can't figure, it would all work out, eventually.
You never stop loving, if you truly loved. That won't change, and I'm fine with it.

I guess I'm just...ready for something else.