It's been about a year since I joined LDS Singles. And I have yet to have an actual date come out of this. One "almost" that cancelled at the last minute, but nothing else that even came close.
I suppose, if I'd wanted to lower my standards, there are a few I could have dated. A few "frequently attends church" or maybe some of the scary ones. But I reserve the right to be just a little particular, about a few things that are important to me.
So, this is it for me. I'm done paying for the singles site. I won't remove my profile, but I'm not going to pay the fees, either.
I'll grant you, I could have worked harder at this, spent more time looking and flirting and sending messages, but I didn't. I know my attitude has something to do with my results. I'm not saying there's nobody out there worth dating, or that it's not my fault I didn't get a date yet. I accept that I'm not as enthusiastic as I could have been. I accept that I got out of it what I put into it. I also recognize that I was the one standing in my own way.
I'm not trying to be a downer here. It's just that, with no results to speak of, and $14.99/mo leaving my bank account for this privilege, well, I don't like paying for something that's not useful. I pay about the same for my Netflix, and I could cancel that instead, go to Red Box, or just not watch as many movies (and TV series) at home on DVD. I stay with Netflix because I can get BBC TV series, and other odd things you can't get at the local Blockbuster or Red Box. I'm getting something out of that, is the point. Something I feel is worth the money.
On the upside, I do feel like I'm more willing to accept someone new in my life. Before this experiment, I didn't really want to date, and I had my reasons. I was waiting for him, no matter how illogical, and he wasn't going to be on any dating sites. I knew I was putting my future on hold for something not likely to happen. I'm okay with that. I don't feel like I've wasted valuable time, or missed out on something that otherwise "could have been". But I do feel more open to other possibilities now, which I really didn't before. I couldn't get myself past what I wanted, in an ideal world, to allow myself to even consider anyone new. I'm open to the possibility now, which, in a way, might have been worth the trouble/money. Or not.
I'm not giving up. I'm just leaving the LDS Singles site, with all the "never/seldom/frequently attends church", "some college", self-employed single men that seem to congregate there. Not to mention the still-married fellas who seem to think it's okay, because they're just waiting on the paperwork. Or whatever their excuse is.
What I'm looking for just isn't there.
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Makes sense. It always seems like it would be easier for a man to find a good woman than vice versa. Do you know what I mean? A good guy is hard to find these days. I hope you don't value yourself just from this experience. You are one special lady and the right guy hasn't come around yet. I sure do hope that you keep your blog updated though....
ReplyDeleteum, yeah, well, I sort of started another blog, a while back. I was meaning to get pictures up to go with some of the posts, and didn't get to that yet, but I kept posting anyway, even though I didn't tell anyone about it yet. Point is, I was going to tell folks about it once I had pictures up with the posts, but that hasn't happened yet. So, you can find my real-life (as opposed to my dateless-life) blog here: http://monkeyhousefull.blogspot.com/
ReplyDeletewasn't trying to hide it or anything, time got away from me, or whatever.
(although, if you had ever clicked on my profile, you would have seen that I kept another blog)
as for the dating/finding the right guy thing...I know he's out there. If anything happens in my dating life, I'll post it here. just don't expect much from this corner for a while.